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Reflection:

Yesterday was tough. And I was the one who made it tough. It didn't have to be tough, I made it so. 

I don't want today to be tough. I want to make it easy... and worthwhile.

Entry:

Today I am starting to write again. It has been some time, especially since I wrote in here... Let me check how much time: December 11, 2024 - 76 days. I suppose that is some time. And before that I had been very sporadic as well with entries. In writing in here I am attempting to recapture, or rather capture again, that exercise I took years ago, in writing every day on a blog, attempting to reach insight and clarity every morning.

There is power and strength in writing that I forget about. They say the pen is mightier than the sword, but TLDR rules the world. Collapsible articles. That stay collapsed until you click on them. This is interesting, an interesting idea.

What am I trying to accomplish this morning with this writing? What am I trying to say and do? What is my goal? What are my goals? At least my goals in writing... What are my writing goals?

To say what I mean. To be sure that what I mean is what I am trying to say. What? I don't know.

This morning writing is a bit of a struggle to get started, partly because I am censoring what I write a little bit, knowing it will go out on the web. But, I feel it is important to put it out there, it is a feeling behind which I am feeling accountable. Accountable to the interneters, who may never ever read a word of what I write, but that still hold me accountable for writing sensically and with passion and interest. 

No one wants it, but it's what I've got. And so I will give it.

Summary:

In which I learn the meaning and purpose of writing, and appreciate its role in my daily life.

Reflection:

As stated yesterday, yesterday was a day. And in that day, I made some headway. Going to snap pictures of the paper journal now. I put them at the bottom of this post.

Entry:

This morning I am going to write  a little bit. I always look back at my past and try to "get back to it". I can't go back, and to forge a better future, I need to focus on the future desires and what I can do in the present to bring that future state about.

So, I will write, and toward insight and clarity, every day.

As I go along, I will try to learn how to improve my writing, through any number of techniques and books/information.

It may be difficult work, but it should be enjoyable, not drudgery. This is my desire.

Chained to a desk, but by personal choice this time... what would I want to say? What would I want to have said?

When it comes to work, I know what it is. I do. And I don't like it. But I want to do it for the sake of writing. What is that sake? - What does it mean?

Well, for starters, it means an audience. Someone might read this. That makes the approach slightly different than if I knew no one was going to read it. But these are the things:

1. an audience.

And in an audience there is a person, a single person for which I would choose to write. 

Let me focus on that single person... what is their makeup? Who are they? What do they want, need, love, cherish, hate?

Wild and crazy.

My mind goes off in tangents, and I lose the line of the words. I will try to keep the line instead. I will try to keep the line.

There is much to do and see and be... these are the things - stick with them... over and over... and over.

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Reflection:

Today. was a day. and that's about all... found some clarity - searched and found some... that's for sure. Gotta get up and find the journal pages and take some pictures of them. But the main thing, the main take away is that I am going to write. I am a writer, so I am going to write. I was distracted by music, art, day job... but really, I am going to write.

Entry:

All of what happens and all of what matters comes over and through all of this... these are the things. Gotta get out... gotta get out get out get out. These things.

And now, and here, and there, these are the things. I don't want to ... I don't... and so I may or so I may not.

So much nonsense... and that is okay, that is what it is... what matters is that I write the words... that is what is important. That is what makes a difference... here there and everywhere.

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Now, here we are.

Insight:

1. Write.

Summary:

Became a writer again... no art, no music, just write... do that thing.

If there ever was a way, I'd find it.

Here.

As if I'd found a way.

In the midst of all of it.

Here and hiding in the middle of the street. I can't be found.

There I was and I am no longer in the midst of it, I can no longer be seen.

Come and find me.

Where were you going when you walked away, out through the door, away through the field into the night?

I didn't know then and I don't know now.

But it happened.

So much happens.

Over and over again, the same and different things, all crashing in, one upon another.

And the differences are such that there is always enough to be a part of it.

I didn't know what to make of any of it, and so I just continued to do what needed to be done. 

And that was all.

I'm going for it here. And why not? Why shouldn't I?

You know I will, and I will live forever doing it.

There may be places that this makes sense, and there may be places that this doesn't make sense.

I'll live in both places. Thanks.

Less is more.

Less is more.