Writing has become a life line for me. It is something I do compulsively, something that helps me gather all of my thoughts together, and place them down in a straight line. Sure, the line dips and jags from time to time, but for the most part, my thoughts are straight when I write them.
By writing I am learning about myself. I am learning that I am interested in life and living much more than I previously thought. In the same way that writing is a life line, reading provides sustenance as well. The reading that I decide to do is all based on the interests that I have at the time.
I am intimidated to be writing my thoughts on this blog. But I have to be courageous and write anyway. I can write and write and write. But it goes nowhere if I don't share it. And so I am sharing it. I am sharing my writing, for better or for worse.
Writing is not the only thing I have to share. I also have art and music to share with others. It is a wonderful thing to share with others. It is a great thing to be involved with the world and be interested in something that is going on in the world.
My interest right now is taken up with the idea of sharing my writing. Writing something worth sharing, then sharing it. What does writing offer the rest of my life? Clarity. Writing brings clarity to my thoughts.
I get hung up on the possibility of sharing my writing, when really I should just be focused on the writing itself, and worry about the sharing later. That is what I will do now. Worry about the writing only. Back to my hermitage. Back to my place of safety to regroup, to write.
Write right now. Get a piece of paper out and begin writing. There is no end in sight, only miles and miles of blank page, which is yours to fill up. There is practice in there, there is a light in that tunnel, and it is shining for you, the writer.
Can writing capture life? I think writing can reflect life. And it is a pretty good mirror. There is much to be cleaned and polished in my writing, much that I have to change and enhance so that my mirror accurately reflects life, but it is something that I am willing and interested to do.
What will it take to polish my writing mirror? What will it take to polish it to a shining reflector that can pierce the darkness with its truth and might? What will it take?
It will take practice, discipline, energy and perseverance. It will take the exercise of fruitful creation combined with a ruthless eye for editing. There is only one way for me to create the circumstances for this to happen. I must just practice and write, there is no other way. If I decide to think about writing, nothing will get done. If I decide to reflect on what I have written, nothing will get done. The only way to move forward is to write the most worthless drivel imaginable on a regular basis, and hone the words down through practice, polishing as I go and making sense of the senseless on the way.
Sometimes I pause while writing and try to think of something pithy or resounding or astounding to say, but really, the only thing I need to do is write one more word. One. More. Word. One word at time, it all comes forth. One word at a time, the pearl necklace is strung. It takes a little bit of time, and a lot of energy and concentration, but the work afterwards stands for itself.
I have taken some time away from the blank page over the past few months. I have taken a break with the full knowledge that I was standing back in the shadows, unwilling to bring forth any work. I was unwilling because I thought it had to be something profound. I was wrong. I had forgotten what I started this endeavor for: to let my light shine. Not necessarily the best light I have to offer, or the light I think is the right light for the right time, but to just let it shine regardless, and let the rays fall where they may.
I started this blog to share my creative life with the world, and that is what I am doing. It grows in fits and starts, but it is growing. It takes time to build a masterpiece. I bet most masterpieces looked far from perfect before they were done. This isn't done yet. I am just getting started. It will take a long time to complete this project, but I am in it for the long haul.
I am dedicated to the idea of sharing my growth with the world. I am scared, but that is okay. Some risks are worth taking. I can't forget that I am an American original, and only I have the ability to share my unique experiences.
Writing takes time. Writing takes reflection, but not as much reflection as I have been affording myself lately. Writing takes reflection as it is being written, not before or after. I must mull the words over in my mind as I write them, not in the past or in the future. I am thinking in the present, and I am writing in the present.
The present is all I have. The present is my lifeline. Beyond writing and art and music and reflecting, all I have to offer is the present, and all I have to enjoy is in the present.
Be present.
Be here.
Be now.
Write.
It's my life and I'm going to write it down and share it. I hope you find it something to learn from and enjoy.
There is time between all the events in life to write and to create something that is worth the time taken to create. All creation is worth the time it takes to create. The market may not agree, but the universe does.
I write. I live. I burn with energy and desire to write and share. I am scared to share. I am afraid to publish this, but it is important to me to let others know that it is okay to face your fears. Choose your battles and face your fears. Be bold. Act. Take action. Move constantly in the direction of your dreams.
What are my dreams? To write and create art and music to share with the world all the days of my life. In that respect, today is a success. I can only hope tomorrow will be as well. But I can also do more than hope, I can set myself up for success. I can lead myself to take action in the direction I want to go and grow.
I can follow in the footsteps of others. I can learn from others who have gone before me. I can learn from others who are moving toward their dreams right now. I know of a few. This blog is published as an example of someone moving toward his dreams, and all the trials and successes along the way. Hopefully it can serve as an inspiration to one person somewhere, at some time.
Time is a funny thing. I am writing this in the present. You are reading this in the present. But our presents are different in clock time. Perhaps I will devise a way to publish live every letter I type and every word I rewrite at the time I am writing it. That could be entertaining. Would it serve a purpose? Does it matter?
Little by little I am getting there. Sometimes it takes more time than I thought it would. Other times I am just not applying myself.
Well, here is me applying myself now, and that is all I can ask for and do. Apply myself now. Right now. Write now.
